Hair, Clothes, Make-up and Women's Lib

Most men like longer hair.

No one really thinks too much about that because it's seen as feminine. So people just kind of see it as "Well, duh! Red blooded heterosexual men like girly girls, so of course they prefer long hair. Nothing more to think about."

But I have thought a lot about hair and how long and short hair impacts LIFESTYLE and behavior and psychology. I've also thought a lot about how society defines femininity.

Feminine is to a large degree defined as deferential, subservient, putting her man and his career first and to a large degree in heteronormative culture playing his personal servant.

She does the women's work, such as cooking and cleaning.

A lot of years ago, I was on a discussion forum and one of the guys talked once about having dated a woman with very long hair and he got tired of her crap and didn't miss the long hair when the relationship ended because everything revolved around her hair and he couldn't do anything with her.

She wouldn't go swimming with him or wouldn't do so spontaneously because chlorine and wet long hair was a big problem for HER. So either she simply never went swimming or maybe it had to be planned in advance because of her hair.

He contemptuously said he felt like he wasn't dating a woman, he was dating a head of hair and he wasn't interested in ever being with a chick with long hair again. That really made a big impression on me and was good for thought and you can to some substantial degree either blame him or thank him that this post exists.

His story about her not going swimming resonated with me because I had shoulder length hair in Kansas and it was colder where I lived in Kansas than where I lived in Germany and by then I had already stopped drying my hair. This meant I had to plan my life in winter around having wet hair for several hours a day and it was a substantial burden that only worked because I was a homemaker.

I couldn't have had long, fragile hair that doesn't play well with heated appliances while living someplace very cold and keep my hair looking good if I had also had a job.  I only had the luxury of keeping my hair shoulder length under those difficult circumstances because I was a homemaker. 

By the time I had a corporate job, I had extremely short hair for medical reasons and I didn't own a hairdryer or comb and I spent essentially no time on my hair. That fact helped me not only work at all but it also helped me work a lot of overtime one year in spite of being very sick the entire time.

I haven't bothered to talk much about this online because I don't need the hatred, but it has occurred to me that substantial burden of hair, clothes and makeup imposed on women in ways and to a degree we don't impose on men is one reason men are more able to put their time and energy into career success.

For at least SOME men, very long hair may have associations with less educated, more subservient and poorer women who are more easily controlled. It may not even be something they do CONSCIOUSLY. 

They may just have firsthand experience that the women they've been involved with who had very long hair were relationships they liked more and they may not have analyzed why that is, but it may be a proxy for someone who cooks, cleans, does their laundry, readily takes on the role of personal servant and has no real ambition of her own and that works for him and makes his life happier, so he "likes" long hair because he likes subservient women eager to be his property and he doesn't feel any need to think too much about why long hair is something he likes.

For such men, their lizard brain goes "Long hair is HOT!" because long-haired women had relationships to them they liked being in. 

Even if they are consciously aware they are using long hair as a proxy for doormat, it's generally not socially acceptable to baldly state that you want a woman to essentially be your bitch. However, it is socially acceptable to baldly state that you like long hair as sexually attractive or as a dating preference and no one is going to openly say "Dude, gross. Buy a blow up doll if women are nothing but sex objects to you! What a CREEP!"

But the reality is that if any detail of physical appearance is, per se, a deal breaker for you, you are basically treating women as sex objects. It's rare for women to insist men need to look a certain way. It's common practice and common knowledge that men routinely sort by looks as step one in deciding who to ask out.

We all know this goes on. Everyone KNOWS this goes on.

But you can pretty much bet money people will have a cow about this post pointing it out and suggesting that men who do this are creeps.